I need to ask you some questions, Yes, You! Why do you lie?
To avoid explaining your actions to people?
Do you do it just because you can?
Do you consider telling the truth something that only set you free in theory?
Telling the truth at all times means you do it even when it is inconvenient for you and telling the truth could make you the enemy. It means you believe that “silence is consent” and you’d would rather stick your neck out against perceived injustice than let sleeping dogs lie, but is there such a thing as too much truth?
Imagine this, a woman, barely out of the woods holding unto your hands, hanging onto life by a thread, asks you “How is my child?”. You just lost her child a few minutes ago, the body still warm, you remember unseeing eyes that were staring into yours, eyes you had to shut yourself. Is telling the truth too much?
Growing up, my little brother could not lie. That was bad! All my parents had to do to find out the truth was ask him. He was not telling the truth because he was afraid of going to hell or any reason for that matter. He could not lie and that’s the way it was but he was getting us in trouble. So we had to recruit him, we would refuse to give him stuff, refuse to play with him for ratting us out. He would cry and after a while, he started “covering” for us.
Some people believe the sole purpose of our life on earth is to be good, to hurt no one and if telling a lie means you get to save a life, then you do it as if your life depended on it.
I don’t know why you tell lies, but I think I know why I do it; I am afraid. I’m afraid of being called boring or snobbish, of being perceived as offensive and annoying. It’s why I cook up strange illnesses to get out of having to hang out with friends and one of the ten reasons why I am the worst person to ask how you look after a makeover.
How do you honestly tell someone that their makeup is horrible? “Say it with love”, they say, but like everything else, that only sounds reasonable in theory. Imagine these two scenarios;
A: How does my makeup look?
B: It looks terrible. You look like you got a makeover from a mad clown.
A: How does my makeup look?
B: Hahaahahahah! You could have used a lot of help. It’s so you though
Who was more truthful and honest? Who is going to hurt the audience?
I think the main thing we all have to accept is that lying is not usually about the other person. Just like most things we do as humans, it is incredibly selfish. We lie for ourselves, to protect ourselves from the painful things we believe would come from telling the truth. We lie to ourselves. You trick your gullible heart into believing everything is fine and your dumbass boyfriend isn’t cheating on you with your best friend and it’s terminal cancer but maybe there is a cure, a miracle and you have to keep searching.
Maybe I do know why you lie. You lie because you are afraid. If you told your friends the truth, they would not be your friends anymore; if you told your child you are not waiting for him and he should not go get his slippers, he would cry and you are a good parent, you don’t want your child to cry; if you told the truth at work, you could lose your job; if you told that story as it is, you wouldn’t get sympathy or laughs and what is life without that? My little brother started lying because he was afraid of the things he would miss out on for being honest and he was barely four.
I have always believed that the most dangerous person is one without shame and to live without shame is to look the truth in the face, and embrace it, accept it and proclaim it so much that you take away the power other people have to shame you.
To tell the truth, is to be without shame but at what cost?